HOW TO SAY ‘NO’ IN ROMANCE

The OtherlifeSometimes in our writings, we come across an area where we want to put our feet down–more like our pen or fingers. We think about something we need to cross and do not know how. This is when you let your characters act.

Your character wants or needs constant nurturing and the other character does not have all the answer in the time of need.Both characters are adults, but one is still not grown up. In other words, one character needs a hand held at all times. When these characters first met, this presented a new opening for one and a downer for the other. Left unaddressed, the fester builds and a battle ensues. Now, the outcome depends upon the genre of your novel. If you are in the mystery thriller, you can “delete” a character, but with a romantic suspense, this decision should be put off until you find an answer to their problems. In most situations, this happens without notice. It is when you, the writer, gets inside their heads. Show your characters ways not yet thought about, and then let them take the lead. This is a slow process, but you have a whole novel for characters to make changes, if they want to.

Empathy is another way to make the other character aware of the constant need of approval. Some characters will never get over the need for attention, and when this happens, the other character gets to a blas’e point.  Either there is enough energy between them to counter this or they separate.

Who is right? Who is wrong? No one. Each character must live within the area of the author’s mind and make peace with herself/himself or destruction becomes prevalent.

Have you ever had a character want to walk toward a dance with another and neither knows the song or the step? This is a chance to have your two young characters embark on an unusual journey. Dancing into love would make your readers sit up and take notice. They could relive their own romance, many years ago. This is not make-believe, but memories flooding to the surface reaching out to everyone. As a writer, you have great opportunities to make changes in the world of writing and reading.

Most important — listen and pay attention to your characters. Sure, they can come up with unbelievable options and unrealistic senses, but do not hold them back. Go with your characters and make certain they are heard in your writing.  Yeah, you may have to cut, take other routes, but you will give your character love, heart, and reasons for being in your novel. Give your characters free rein and they will always surprise you.

Be sure you send a kiss to every one of them before you sign, THE END.

Happy Writing.

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LEARN TO SWIM WITH YOUR DRAGONS

All_About_Adverbs_photo_FINALIZED3-150x150Dragons? What dragons? I live in the now, not the land of dinosaurs, flying creatures, caves, nor cavemen. I seldom have dreams or nightmares. Nothing frightens me. Do not kid yourselves. We all have dragons and, until you name them, you have no idea how to swim with them.

When one of your dragons is named ‘fear,’ this can pull lives down and down and down. We live in fear of taking a risk, fear of losing material items, fear of being without spirituality. Sometimes my dragon is anger and frustration at how the world has become uncaring. We see a double-edged sword and anger turns into hate. Hate for anything different.

My dragon nudges me on time — not enough time to get everything done and too much time spent on things of no value. Tomorrow will not make a difference. Love can be a dragon. Too little and you sink. Too much and you choke. A give here, take there, use, threaten, all so confusing. Where has the unconditional part of love gone? The love because you are who you are, not what you can get.

Dragons sneak into our lives and wait for the right opportunity to seize our emotions. Then drag us on the bottom of the ocean floor, unless you learn how to swim with them.

When you name each dragon, you put yourself in charge. Sometimes, you swim a side stroke along with your dragon, keeping pace, and looking the dragon straight in the eye. No concessions made, but there is not a struggle. You can tame this dragon.

Another time, you do the breast stroke with your dragon. You pull ahead and do not look back. No shouts of joy or laughter at the lagging beast. Just, confidence in what you can do and the plans you make for the future.

Next, you feel the sun on your face and you go head to head with your dragon in a backstroke movement. You kick your feet in a synchronized pattern, your arms stretch up, back, and you feel the forward movement. The dragon is nowhere in sight.

Night comes and you crawl into bed, confident of the resolutions with your dragon. A name makes such a different in how you see the world, act on positive attitudes, and gives you the ability to holler———-UP PERISCOPE.

Now, you know HOW TO SWIM WITH YOUR DRAGONS. May you have happy dragons in your lives and never ‘drag on’ the ocean floor.

Happy Living. Happy Writing.

BREAK YOUR OWN RULES

DiamondLook at this diamond and notice the brilliance, sparkles, and cuts. Why aren’t we more like a diamond — free to sparkle at any moment, and show a daring brilliance to anyone? Because, we need to live by rules. We have a rule for this, a rule for that, and can always make up a new rule to follow.  Sure, some rules are necessary, but let’s talk about the rules we put on ourselves.

Forget you are a writer, reader, reviewer, office manager, or whatever job you have. Forget everything if you are retired. We need a discussion with a clean plate, and I do not care if you scraped the last morsel off with a knife, fork, spoon, or licked the bowl clean.

Nothing, nothing at all can change yesterday or any part of the past. The future is not a part of the present, so do not get caught up on what might be. Life can change in an instant.

Dare to do something different. Burdens do not allow you to travel light, so do a little re-packing into a small overnight bag. Then, look at all the things you consider burdens and see if there is something you can do to create a new touch. On a second thought, take a look at these burdens and see a different way to look at them. One thing pops up:  LISTS.

Let go of lists, play each moment to moment today in the present. Yeah, you have to get up, fix breakfast, get the kids off to school, hubby off to work, and yourself off to work. No kids, no other off to work, so now you have yourself. You stare at the list posted on the fridge, computer, I-Pad, or phone. What’s the worst thing to happen if you can eliminate some of them?

Maybe, it is time to break your own rules. Look around and enjoy what is before you: the smell of the air, feel the sun on your face, or mist from the early morning. Go for the walk you always wanted to take in the early morning. The house won’t get cleaned, the dirty dishes will not put themselves into the dishwasher, but everything will still be there when you return.

As you walk through life, take the hand next to yours and squeeze. It may be the only touch felt today by you or someone else. Smile. A smile costs nothing and makes the world a better place. Share your smile with all you meet. Smile at everyone, everything, and nothing. You will receive a million smiles back.

Don’t worry.  Remember the old song…don’t worry, be happy,? Try singing the words or humming the tune and realize whatever happens, happens. Learn to roll with the punches. Be flexible and reap the rewards of a few broken rules.

I’d love to hear from you after you have tried breaking a few of your rules. The more we can enjoy life, enjoy others, a free feeling in our lives, the better we can break the rules and roll in the pleasant time of the present.

I want to pass on to all of you a phrase by Emily Dickenson:  “I dwell in possibilities.”

May you have nothing but possibilities pop up for you. I also want to thank all my followers,  and if you want to comment, propose new material for my blog, please check out my website:  http://www.patricia-patterson.com and leave a note in the contact section.I’d love to hear from you.

Hang tight…..the next post will be about demons. Yeah, the monsters we create for ourselves in our lives. We will dig deep and have fun.